World Series 2011: All Eyez On Dis

The final season of The Heirloom could not be complete without a look into the Fall Classic…

I hate obligation.

Jeff from Red State Blue State got his wish, however. His St. Louis Cardinals shocked a lot of people by removing the Milwaukee Brewers out of the postseason equation on enemy ground. The acrimony was running high dating back to the Tweet-off between Albert (As God-like, without the help of Bishop T.D. Jakes) Pujols and Nyjer (Tony Bitch-ass Plushie Kevin Hart wannabe Mark) Morgan. To take the advantage at Busch Stadium into Miller Park, the Cards had to play defense on the Brewers bats.

Success? Absolutely! Now what?

The Texas Rangers return to the Fall Classic for the second year in a row. The Metroplex is a bit more prepared for their second Series, as was the first go-round. They did so by stepping up at the right moments. Dispatching the Detroit Tigers was not as monumental a task as everyone thought, however. Though, I heard it from my colleagues in the automotive industry how disappointed they were that their team simply faltered in the face of the experienced Rangers. There is confidence in the air just south of DFW Airport, except they had not designed a starter for Game 1 in St. Louis.

Is that what you call “prepared?”

Who to pick here…this is a problem. I should care, but I don’t have a horse in the race.

In fact, all of my horses had been slaughtered, ground up and sent to packinghouses for burgers and franks.

The experience of The Heirloom‘s end sent me elsewhere. After the disappointment of the St. Paul Saints losing to the Grand Prairie Air Hogs in the American Association Championship Series, a glimmer of hope arrived in the least likely place in the Twin Cities – Target Center. The Twins and Vikings were worthless pieces of dung in the eyes of the press and disappointed fans. Yet, nine women made us shine – the Lynx.

Lynx 2011 WNBA Championship Parade 21

Incidentally, the Lynx won the WNBA Championship. Women had to do the job of men. Lesbian season ticket holders (and Lavender magazine) took the place of purple-painted faux norsemen or young, drunk and stupid Target Field douchebags in leading the charge towards providing pride in this town.

Yet, another glimmer of hope occurred this weekend. The NSC Minnesota Stars shocked the Carolina RailHawks to advance to the NASL Finals.

A side note: The Twins purchased 500 General Admission tickets to this Saturday’s NASL Finals game at the National Sports Center in Blaine, MN between the Stars and the Ft. Lauderdale Strikers. What are they doing with these tickets is beyond my comprehension. I hope Dave St. Peter have 500 friends to party with along with the Dark Clouds…do y’all have enough free beer for the Twins?

The World Series? Good luck to the Cards and the Rangers in the Fall Classic. Then, give the NL MVP to Matt Kemp…consider Clayton Kershaw for the NL Cy Young…get the new Collective Bargaining Agreement done…screw the plan to fuck with the league and postseason structure…give us a replacement for Bud Selig that will bring baseball into the 21st Century…and end the agony of watching FOX as the primary baseball broadcast network!

If not, we’re gonna #OccupyTheCommissionersOffice!

That’s all I have to say…


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